Patte Reider Ormsby
Marital Status:
Patte Reider Ormsby
Children?
3 smart fellows, they felt smart. (say that 3 times fast). Tim 21, Colin 20, and Peter 13.
Grandchildren?
Not yet
Education:
Yes please. BA Moravian College, continuing art ed all over the place
Occupation:
Artist
Volunteer and Professional Activities:
Lots of art related stuff, donations, PTA, etc.
Current hobbies and interests:
Painting, sculpture, kid maintenance, wifely duties, legal addictive stimulants during the day, wine in the evening, insomnia at night. And I like cats. Except when they pee where they aren't supposed to. I hate that.
What percentage of your hair is visibly gray (is this a trick question?)
Hard to tell, hairdresser keeps covering it up against my protestations that I earned it and it looks more like blonde than my real color, whatever that is.
If you had one year free of all responsibility and unlimited funds, what would you do?
Live and paint in Ptown have a really big studio and spend late summer and fall in Heidelberg
What are the most rewarding things that you have done in your life?
25 years of marriage, 3 good sons, no Barbies, making, showing, selling art. Getting into juried shows and winning awards for my art. Making an Osama Bin Laden Voodoo doll and wondering if it is working. Making a chandelier. I learned neurosurgery, and found the Holy Grail. The usual.
What rewarding things do you plan to do in your life?
I might be moving to Montana soon, just to raise me up a crop of dental floss. Just me and the pygmy ponies over by the dental floss bush. Raising it up, waxing it down, in a little white box that I could sell uptown. By myself I wouldn't have no boss, cause I'd be raising my lonely dental floss.
What are your favorite non-family related things to do in your free time?
Go to galleries and museums, and party with friends, some things never change.
How would you best describe your idea of "being successful?"
Well, hmmm, a good night's sleep, no worries, a piece of my work in a respectable museum, a flat stomach, having Bill Murray, Howard Stern, and Barbra Streisand on speed dial, a wheelbarrow full of hundreds in the living room (stop me when I get to one I did yet), a clean house, having fingernails, owning my own sweat shop, having a studio as big as a warehouse, have a little apartment in each city I like visiting, have my grown children settle nearby so I can continue to boss them around……. Oh yeah, and world peace, almost forgot.
What are your most vivid memories of your days in Ridgewood?
Here goes: Waking up at Coogstock after falling asleep at 8pm, missing most of the party, and waking up to stumble over wall to wall sleeping bodies as I searched with Iggy for something to drink only to find the apple juice tainted with vodka! Running Mateus, Skinny dipping at the Point and Graydon with Dave Fairweather, Raiding Hondo's refrig with Mosc in the middle of the night. Sobriety test at Skylands and strip search at Ringwood Manor with Mosc, Hondo and Eric. Burning down Eric Silverman's kitchen with France Dubois' fondue. Frank Zappa! My 18th birthday present from Bob Faath. Cruising to Harriman. All you the beer you can drink at Steak and Brew. Learning the importance of craftsmanship from Mrs.Mahoney. Having pina coladas with Linda Guido during our final exam with Mr.Verost. Spell checking Jack O'neill's English papers. Party caravans in Fred Bir's Nova with Jeff Donald. Chugging beer faster than Mr. Earl. Sun of a gun, dirty rat, Mr. Bennett. Ballroom dancing with Mr. McCutcheon and Mitch Burgner. Hanging out on Jack's porch and barfing from same. Drinking screwdrivers on the church steps with Margot Perron. Flaming shots at Coog's and the subsequent blister on the end of Robey's nose. Jim Stock in Waiting for Godot. Making friends with Tracey Sweeney on our birthday in 9th grade at Sturbridge Village and playing field hockey ONLY because she made me. Pissing off Mike Griffone. Visiting Jack's sister Cathy when she wasn't home so we could hang out her land lady, Eleanor. John Cerf's guitar, Gloria. Eating Gail Lyon's lunch and watching Tracey pick every chocolate chip out of a 3 pack of cookies. 6th grade with Mr. Egli. Booby trapping the girl's bathroom with Dave Burden in 6th grade. Chorus with Mr. Colossimo. Ruthanne, Ruthanne, Ruthanne.
What achievement or activity are you most proud of in your life?
All the Ormsby men that make up my family.
What single piece of wisdom would you like to leave for the next generation?
Do NOT pronounce the t in the word often. Say it like this: offen. Do you say whisTle or lisTten? So don't say ofTen. I hate that.
How have you changed since high school?
We are 30 f---ing years older! Whaddaya think? I am starting to look and sound like my parents. I have to wear glasses. My boobs are a little bigger, but they sag. My ass is slowly migrating to my stomach, but I can tell it is still back there because whenever I run (which isn't ofTen) it slams up and hits me in the back of the head hard and gives me a concussion.
I am way more assertive from years of yelling at kids and practicing on telemarketers, and I usually finish what I start unless it is a book that's taking too long and then I read the end halfway through to see if it is worth finishing.
What else should we know about you?!
I see dead people. Just kidding.